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Open Question: please help i am at rock bottom.?
hi
i am 22 year old male, only a couple of months ago i was perfect, 200%, i worked surfed and gymed every day, i loved my life and was always happy, i was always up for a challenge so i decided to take a 10 day meditation retreat - vipassana, this intense course consists of a noble silence in which you do not talk/make eye contact, etc was all good untill the last day when we were aloud to talk, i being myself thought it was a good idea to make a joke infront of everyone, approx 100 people, the joke was perceived well but leading up to and whilst saying i suffered a panic attack, which i have never had before, i will also add that i was fed gluten 2 hours prior and i am gluten intolerant, i have had constant anxiety ever since and severe depression and cannot quite grasp reality, i cannot take part in anything i like anymore because simply i dont like anything, i really need a miracle because im definatly looking at death being the better option at the moment please if anyone one has any input i would love to hear it as im slowly losing myself every day i have been like this for a month and a half now
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