Sunday, August 5, 2012

Open Question: does anyone else do this?




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Open Question: does anyone else do this?



for some reason when i was in middle school and high school i used to always put my head down, and everyone thought i was sleepy or tired, but the reason why i did this was i tried to avoid people looking at me or my presence near them, and i felt really awkward so i just put my head down, this happened when either we had to work together in groups or something and i would always avoid eye contact, i rarely do this anymore, but i still have the issue with eye contact or socializing, everytime i did a speech in school i would either have a flat expression and look at something distant in the classroom, not look at all, and even when the teacher was talking to me, i just kept staring at my notecard, cuz i didnt know where she was. and was scared to put my head up and try to find her with everyone looking at me. also when im outside going to get food and ordering something in the fast food or restraunt i get nervous and feel awkward cuz the person is waiting for me to order and i have a problem reading things when someone is watching me. the head putting down thing i only did up till like 10th grade, but i learned some meditation techniques so i rarely do it now, im 19 now, but also for the meditation to work i usually need an object to be placed in front of me like my backpack so i can mess with it, or like my binder with it open so i can just stare at something and then i can listen to conversations clearer. and i do repitive things like saying random inside jokes i make up, or everytime i see my dad, i call him the same nickname like 100 times a day.







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